This post covers the fiction I published on this blog from March 2015 through March 2016.
If you’ve not read the previous two posts about this blog and my fiction and you have a strong desire to read all the fiction I write, here’s a quick reminder. The first four years were covered in THIS post. The year five was covered in THIS post.
Following that progression, this post should cover year six of dispersering fiction. And so it does.
If you have no desire to read any of my fiction, stop right here and go on your way as nothing below will interest you. Vade con spaghetti monstrum volantes.
Repeating the previous disclaimer, “. . . in compiling the list below I might have missed small flash pieces that are not specifically identified in the title. Meaning, I have a habit of plopping a story inside a post that has nothing to do with writing. Sadly, unless I come across those gems accidentally, I may go years not even remembering I wrote them.“
Anyway, here we go . . . again:
A wee bit of writing (I used to read the Writer Unboxed blog occasionally participated in the writing prompt competition. I seldom got any feedback or comments and after a bit, I got tired of trying to break into the clique. I still follow the blog and read the occasional useful advice but I no longer contribute. Anyway, their writing prompts were in the form of photographs; you looked at a photo and came up with a story. See if you can figure out why few liked my stories.)
Auto-correct (I wrote this in a fit of frustration with a couple of grammar checkers I use. They never get tired of telling me that ellipses are unnecessary or misplaced. Then, they tell me I should capitalize the first word after the ellipsis. And always with telling me where to put my commas.)
50 Words Flash Fiction Challenge: Wounded (This post got more positive comments for the associated photos and commentary than the fiction. Still, I think the fiction was clever and, you guessed it, with a surprise twist, and in just fifty words. Not as easy as people might think.)
Photos and writing (This post discusses my then-upcoming visit to Viable Paradise XIX. It also introduces what would eventually become a short story I quite like. I was going to link the full story here but I figure it’ll be something readers can look forward to below.)
Observed (This is the product of another one of those instances. You know them; I get an idea and I start writing. Before I know it, I have a pretty good lead-in into what sounds like a story with a promise of being interesting. As a matter of note, I like the dialogue between the two characters. I mean, I should; I wrote it.
Foray into LotR FanFic (I hate to again say it, but I really like this piece of fan fiction. I wrote it in response to a conversation on Facebook — something I no longer do, converse on Facebook, that is. It should be noted I really like the Lord of the Rings film adaptation, but there are annoying scenes in that movie. Scenes that still bother me when we rewatch the trilogy and that drove the telling of this short piece.)
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Another example of the calendar writing I mentioned in the previous fiction post, and no, they weren’t always long:
I know I should have some humorous thing here . . . let me see; maybe a quote from Lily Tomlin — “I always wanted to be somebody, but maybe I should have been more specific.”
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Lester Dent Pulp Fiction Plot (in one of my many posts about writing — which I will also summarise in honor of the tenth anniversary of this blog — I decided to follow the “Lester Dent master plot formula” for writing short stories. Thus, Michelle Maul, P. I. was born. Two years later I penned a sequel to this story — a longer and more serious sequel — and I plan to add a few more.)
So, prior to my attending Viable Paradise XIX, I had the idea of writing ten short stories in September, hence SeDiTESSWriMo (September is Disperser Ten Short Stories Writing Month). As it turned out, I would only write five. Notice that the first four are password-protected because the idea was to submit them — and yes, I did, submit them; all were rejected multiple times. Again, if you want to read them, ask for the password in the comments or email me.
Protected: SeDiTESSWriMo Number 1 (The Shirt)
Protected: SeDiTESSWriMo Number 2 (Nancy — a continuation of a previous flash piece.)
(Protected: SeDiTESSWriMo Number 3 (Shift)
Protected: SeDiTESSWriMo Number 4 (Timeline — a continuation of the previous piece “Wolf, are you there?”)
(Note: these versions are all first drafts. The stories were subsequently edited, honed, tweaked and other unspeakable stuff was done to them before I submitted them to various paying markets.)
Remember I few paragraphs ago I mention the intro to a story that got expanded and that I quite like? Once I knew I wasn’t going to meet my goal of ten stories, I quickly expanded that short introduction into a fun short story. Fun as enjoyable to write, not necessarily humorous. Of the people who read all five stories I wrote that month, they liked this one best. Go figure. For your enjoyment, presented as written and not password-protected.
The fifth September short story (The title is Hens and the post has some great photos of muffin faces before getting to the story proper.)
I be alive and well (In this post, a story about the negotiation between Orcs and filmmakers regarding their depiction in movies. It was written very quickly while I was at Viable Paradise. Unfortunately, I screwed up by publishing this story on the blog. You see, we were supposed to submit whatever we wrote; try to sell it, that is. By publishing it on the blog, I gave up FNASR and the chance to sell it to most paying markets . . . not that anyone would have bought it.)
Halloween 2015 (Coming back from Viable Paradise, I was pretty stoked to write. Halloween was just around the corner and I wrote a quick fantasy piece. Side Note: shortly after this, an author I follow posted a comment that people should give sentient swords a rest. And no, he hadn’t read my post.)
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In the November 2015 calendar, I took the opportunity to vent some anger:
So, I was in King Sooper today, and I purchased one item. I’m heading to the express lane (15 item limit). I’m about to enter the lane (there was one customer ahead of me). A late-twenties couple was coming along the crossing aisle, and I politely stopped to let them go past before entering the express lane. They stop right in front of me and look at the sign. It says “15 Items Limit” written in large letters. The man looks at their full cart and says something to the wife. She shrugs, and they turn the car and enter the express lane. But not before looking back at me and my one item. I must have been invisible, or they were assholes because they did not seem concerned about 1) going into the fast lane with what was obviously a lot more than 15 items, and 2) they did not have the common decency to let me go ahead of them. I’m going with assholes, especially since they both took out their phones and nonchalantly started checking their asshole ratings.
I wanted to say something, really I did. But, it would have risked an altercation because few people are pleased hearing themselves called regressive monkey ass droppings. Not that I have any qualms about offending regressive monkey asses droppings, but I avoid confrontations unless absolutely necessary since I normally carry and was in this instance. The last thing I want is some regressive monkey ass dropping getting all belligerent and shit (pardon the language).
I moved to the other express lane which had three people ahead of me . . . each with a few items. By the time I checked out the poor cashier in the other lane was trying to handle bagging what turned out to require at least seven stuffed plastic bags and do so with a small counter space designed for, you guessed it, at most 15 items.
Really, I wish stores would enforce those signs, or at least modify them to read something like “15 Items Limit Unless You Are A Regressive Monkey Ass Dropping”.
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NaNoWriMo No. 3 – Twelfth Update – I’m a failure (This was meant to be humor, me saying that I only wrote 49,999 words for NaNoWriMo, missing the 50,000 words goal by one word. I assumed people would realize it’s a joke, but I got a few commemorations with better luck next time. Actually, I had blown by the goal with ease. This post also has two quick flash pieces that are also aimed at being funny . . . they probably also missed the mark.)
Disperser Update #381f (at Viable Paradise, there were some people who were huge fans of everything Unicorn. I held no opinion one way or the other since I’m not big on mythical beings. However, it was convenient and fun to choose a side . . . in my case, the side I chose was that Unicorns are basically pests. This post has two flash pieces — both responses to prompts — exploring possible uses for Unicorns.)
Protected: Flash Challenge – Future Graveyard (Another flash challenge — you can read about the challenge HERE — that is password-protected because I shopped it around. This is the as-written version but there’s an updated and expanded version that will come up later on. Regardless, it was well-received on the blog and even though it was rejected, I got positive feedback along with the rejection letter.)
Another Flash Challenge – The Manor Above (This was in response to another flash challenge from the terribleminds blog. Not password protected because I thought it a bit light for submission, but a fun piece to write and read. There’s a bit of discussion in the comments about writing that might be interesting to some.)
I occasionally listen to the Mythcreantspodcast and they also have a blog. In that blog, they discussed Second Person POV and I wanted to see if I could write in Second Person Point of View. After I wrote the story, I was asked if I thought I could write a story from a female point of view — obviously, they didn’t know many of my main characters are female. In response, I rewrote the same story but from the point of view of the female character in the story. Again, a fair amount of discussion (about writing) in the comments.
A Second Person POV Self-Challenge
Redux: A Second Person POV Self-Challenge
NNWM-2K15 (NaNoWriMo No. 3) Post Mortem (having finished the novel that would become Gin’s War, I reflect on this writing thing. No fiction, but talking about fiction.)
Protected: Future Graveyard – revised and expanded (This is the expanded version — now at about 4,100 words — of Future Graveyard.)
Protected: NaNoWriMo No. 3 – First Draft (unedited) – Complete (The complete third NaNoWriMo novel, eventually to be titled Gin’s War. I really want to shop this around but I’m not sure where. Or when. Or whether I should bother.)
A Bit of Flash and Cruisers IX (My response to the challenge to write a complete story in 100 words or less.)
Dragons, Unicorns and Likes (In 2015, Alliteration Ink had an open entry for short stories that began with the phrase “No shit, there I was“. For reasons I explain in the post, I never sent it in. Eventually, I decided to post it on the blog. It has dragons and unicorns. I think it’s interesting, but what do I know?)
So, there you go . . . probably at least 98.79% of the fiction I wrote during year six of this blog. Most people who follow my blog — actually follow, not just subscribe and never again visit — have read all of these. Some might want to revisit a few favorites. others have had enough of them the first time around. It would be nice if a few new followers (or casual visitors) read a few of these and let me know what they think. They can be as brutal or kind as the mood strikes them; I can take it.
That’s it. This post has ended . . . except for the stuff below.
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