Leg update numero due

Humanity has taken an interest in the progress of my hurt leg. I am flattered and humbled by the outpouring of well-wishes, I am grateful to the throngs of people who took time from their busy lives to inquire about my thigh, and I am somewhat ashamed to admit I am not going to die, thus making all this concern a bit overblown and perhaps unwarranted.


Well, I am going to die, but probably not as a result of my leg injury. Unless, of course, I’m being chased by an old and enfeebled bear, who would, as a result of my injury, easily catch me for lunch (or dinner). I refer to an old and enfeebled bear because I would not be able to outrun a healthy bear, even at the peak of my physical condition.

First of all, let me give people the password to THIS POST. The password is ‘summabirch’.


I will once more warn people of the graphic nature of some of the images. Just bruises, really, but some people can’t stand to look at beautiful, manly, hairy legs marred by the aftereffect of an injury. To them I say . . . don’t go there.


So, I had my Orthopedic Doctor appointment today. The good news is that no tendons, joints, or bones are damaged. The bad news is that I ripped/tore/bruised at least three of my thigh muscles. Based on the location of the greatest pain when someone pokes really hard with their fingers, the muscles in question are likely the Pectineus, Sartorious, and Vastus medialis, although it could also be some of the adductor muscles.

No MRI required because the damage appears to be restricted to the muscles, and so doing an MRI would learn us ‘not much’.


The prognosis is 6-8 weeks of flexibility and mobility exercises while letting the muscles heal. The exercises are mainly to control the formation of scar tissue, making it possible to get as close to full mobility as we can. After that, strength training to, you know, regain strength in the affected area.

All in all it was a pleasant and informative meeting confirming what I mostly knew . . . it’s a muscle injury; there is no surgical fix, and there is no magic formula to recovery.

The unfortunate thing is that while muscle cramps are not uncommon, the resulting . . . here, let me recreate the situation. Imagine me sitting on the examination table, Melisa seated in the corner chair, and the doctor on one of them neat rolling stools.

We had met this doctor before when Melisa had injured her knee, so we were at ease, and we asked a lot of questions. Here’s the interesting exchange that, you know, made me a bit nervous. We’d just been joking about pain and frustration related to the road of recovery. We’re all smiling because, you know, that’s all it is, and not something worse.

Me: “So, I get it; therapy, recovery, eight weeks.”
Doctor: “Yup; you know the drill.”
Me: “I imagine you’ve seen this kind of thing before.”
Doctor (still smiling): “Nope.”
Me: “Ha-ha . . . wait, you’re serious!”
Doctor: “I know of leg cramps; never had a case where a cramp did this much damage.”

CRAP! . . . We have read on the internet these things sometimes happen when, you know, one is running a marathon, or drop-kicking broccoli across the Grand Canyon, or in other instances of someone doing some strenuous macho-maximus activity. In other words, these things have been known to happen during arduous physical activity.


I just got out of bed after a good night rest.

I asked if he could take a wild guess as to what might have triggered it. He suggested my regular doctor might have an answer. Well, double crap! The regular doctor is just going to repeat all of the stuff I already know about cramps (tons of stuff on the web), and likely do some blood work which, like the blood work they did at the ER, will determine my minerals are balanced, I have no deficiencies (at least below the neck), and my electrolytes are fine.

Translation? We ain’t got a clue why I had a cramp that felt like, and did, tore my thigh apart. I have zero confidence in my regular doctor finding a physical cause. Not because he’s no good; I like my doctor, but I happen to be one of them there healthy individuals with very few bad habits (I occasionally badmouth broccoli).

The concern, then, is something relating to the nervous system. Muscles obey signals from nerves. To me it felt like my leg was on fire (something very different from cramps I previously experienced).


I was hoping for a simple explanation (i.e. lay off the broccoli) leading to me diligently following directions so as to never, ever, ever, again experience something like this.

Instead, for all I know, this might be my way of life from now on. The universe out there, just waiting to wail on me whenever it feels like it. Bastard Universe!


So, here I am. I will dutifully resume my life, slowly building back up to the incredible peak of physical conditioning that was me, and all the while waiting for the next fateful moment when my muscles will be directed by some unknown force, and for no good reason, to rip themselves apart, teaching me no discernible lesson whatsoever.


By the way, the photos have nothing to do with the content of this post. It’s just that some people only look at the pictures, so those are for them.

That’s it. This post has ended . . . except for the stuff below.


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. . .  my FP ward  . . . chieken shit.

About disperser

Odd guy with odd views living an odd life during odd times.
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25 Responses to Leg update numero due

  1. Sorry to hear about your leg injury Emilio. I wish you a speedy recovery :)


  2. AnnMarie says:

    Thanks for the update, glad to hear there’s only recovery ahead, so let’s hope it’s smooth sailing for you.


  3. sandra getgood says:

    That sounds like an excellent plan…..a Caribbean cruise could be very good medicine. The pictures are incredible. That must have been terrifying.. A cramp is one thing, but that one seemed to be trying to tear your leg apart. I hope the doctors are looking into this carefully, so it doesn’t happen again. You probably should consider a regular visit to the Caribbean as part of your regular routine now…no point in taking chances! Even thinking about it should help make you feel better.


    • disperser says:

      The cruise was planned early this year as a way to scout as many Caribbean islands as possible to decide if any are worth visiting for more than a day (they are competing with Hawaii, so my guess is “no”, but the ship has literally tons of food, and we aim to make a dent on their supply).

      By pictures, I assume you mean the ones in the other post, the ones of my leg, and not the above photos from one of our antique stores visits.

      Yeah, I still find it hard to believe that was from a cramp, and that it is now eight days and I still can barely walk. Apparently that incredulity is shared by most of the people I’ve told. I’ll be switching to the drop-kicking broccoli story soon as the more believable of the two stories.

      Honestly, I don’t hold much hope in doctors finding out anything about this. It’s not because I don’t trust modern medicine (I do), or think doctors are incompetent (I don’t) . . . it’s because it’s a one time event not tied to anything I did out of the ordinary.

      I’ve read a lot about thigh cramps, and like I said, very common when doing strenuous exercises or chores. Getting out of bed . . . not so much. I also can’t find this level of damage, although it is sometimes implied, but again, usually when sprinting for the finish line after 26 miles of hard running.

      We’ll see.

      And, if I wanted to really not take chances . . . we’d move to Hawaii. The Caribbean has nowhere near the appeal of the Sandwich Islands.

      Thanks for the concern and comment.


  4. renxkyoko says:


    I’ve never heard of a cramp that tears muscles apart. See ? Even your doctor doesn’t know. OMG, it must have hurt a lot. Of course the pain… I always experience that… I stretch my leg a bit , and bam ! excruciating pain. Anyway, take care.


    • disperser says:

      I plan to take care, even though I’m still unclear as to what triggered this. One thing I know, is that right now I seem to know as much as my doctors. Makes me feel even smarter than usual.


  5. oneowner says:

    The worse part of not knowing what the cause was is that you don’t know if you can prevent it from happening again. Maybe it’s like being struck by lightning, It seldom happens to the same person twice.
    If a doctor doesn’t know something he always sends you to another doctor. Until your insurance runs out.


    • disperser says:

      Honest, I prefer they tell me when they don’t know as opposed, you know, having me sacrificing chickens, and dancing in pink leotards while humming Bolero.

      The unknown can sometimes be scary, but the made up can often be downright deadly.


  6. GD H says:

    Obviously, this was a result of alien abduction and experimentation. We saw the spacecraft over your way at the time this happened.


  7. Stopping in to see how your Ortho doc appointment went.
    “Lay off the broccoli.” If only that could be the cure! (BTW: I love broccoli, so I can eat your share.)
    Maybe in the future the docs will see other people with this exact condition, that happened in the exact same way as to you, and they will name it after you. ??? :-)
    I figure with all the weird medical things I’ve had, some day some disease or some darn thing will be named after me. ;-)
    I know you will follow docs orders for the next couple months. Maybe you could follow his orders on a beach somewhere, being pampered by beautiful women?!?! ;-)
    The photos are superb! I really like the 5th one. :-)
    Healing-HUGS!!! :-)


  8. I’m getting quite envious Emilio, when I had prostate cancer (well I’ve still got it it’s just in remission) I got not one message of support, when I had a stroke and 2 major operations a couple of years back I got even less. Perhaps I should go get my leg chopped off or something :D
    :D :roll:


    • disperser says:

      I suspect your failing was not posting detailed photos of your prostate.

      Seriously, I don’t know what to tell you. I have worked all my life at crafting myself into a rather smug, sarcastic, know-it-all-everyone-else-is-always-wrong jerk who often speaks his mind when he should shut up, is critical of most of humanity’s comings and goings, and loves nothing more than to tell others how my way, the way I live my life, how I think and what I do is the only way a rational, smart, incredibly wise and insightful individual should exist. Nay; have any right to exist.

      . . . perhaps you were too nice . . . but, upon hearing of your past and ongoing issues, be assured you have my sympathy, and my sincere wish that those burdens are now beyond you, and the universe sees it fit to go after someone else, leaving you to enjoy your life.

      . . . have I mentioned my leg?

      Liked by 1 person

  9. PiedType says:

    Glad to hear you’re improving.
    Hey, I’d lay off the broccoli anyway. You never know …


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